where is my mind?
Wednesday, July 30, 2003
all ballet slippers and pointe shoes should come with little elves to sew on the elastic and ribbons for you.
Monday, July 28, 2003
Sunday, July 27, 2003
1.) Are you male or female?:
"i'm just a girlin the world
that's all that you'll let me be"
-no doubt, "just a girl"
2.) Describe your neighborhood:
"this town is fucking insane
how one will starve and another will gain
it's like a giant mechanical brain
and the people are cells and the streets are veins
it thinks only of itself
a thousand limbs crawling as it expands and grows
and still the concrete sits there
sits there stark grey and cold"
-operation ivy, "big city"
3.) How do you look?:
"i am not a pretty girl
don't really want to be a pretty girl
i want to be more than a pretty girl"
-ani difranco, "not a pretty girl"
4.) If you could say something to the person you like, what would it be?:
"i want you to want me
i need you to need me"
-letters to cleo, "i want you to want me"
5.) Where do you wish you were right now?
"new york city, center of the universe"
-angel in RENT
6.) What would you say to your best friend?:
"i never would have opened up but you seemed so real to me"
-sarah mclachlan, "good enough"
7.) Any words of wisdom:
"with your feet in the air and your head on the ground
try this trick, and spin it, yeah
your head will collapse if there's nothing in it"
-pixies, "where is my mind?"
8.) What do you wish you were doing right now?:
"Up and down the coast
Checkin' out the spots that i love the most."
sublime, "paddle out"
9.) What do you think of drugs and alcohol?:
"Sniffing sulfate up my nose
Doing it for a joke
It makes the world spin so fast
Things go better with coke"
-subhumans, "drugs of youth"
10.) If you could say one thing to your enemy, what would it be?:
"nice to know you... goodbye!"
incubus, "nice to know you"
11.) What do you usually do on Friday nights?:
stuff.
12.) What do you think about world peace?:
"no fighting no war no trouble no more"
-lost cherrees, "no trouble" .... if only it were that simple
13.) What do you think about school?:
"The same people who control the school system control
The prison system, and the whole social system"
dead prez, "they schools"
"Won't you believe it
It's just my luck
No recess
You're in high school again"
-nirvana, "school"
14.) How do you feel right now?:
"i'm not happy and i'm not sad"
the smiths, "this night has opened my eyes"
15.) Any closing words?:
"it's not my fault that i'm fucked up"
-naked aggression, "plastic world
"i'm just a girlin the world
that's all that you'll let me be"
-no doubt, "just a girl"
2.) Describe your neighborhood:
"this town is fucking insane
how one will starve and another will gain
it's like a giant mechanical brain
and the people are cells and the streets are veins
it thinks only of itself
a thousand limbs crawling as it expands and grows
and still the concrete sits there
sits there stark grey and cold"
-operation ivy, "big city"
3.) How do you look?:
"i am not a pretty girl
don't really want to be a pretty girl
i want to be more than a pretty girl"
-ani difranco, "not a pretty girl"
4.) If you could say something to the person you like, what would it be?:
"i want you to want me
i need you to need me"
-letters to cleo, "i want you to want me"
5.) Where do you wish you were right now?
"new york city, center of the universe"
-angel in RENT
6.) What would you say to your best friend?:
"i never would have opened up but you seemed so real to me"
-sarah mclachlan, "good enough"
7.) Any words of wisdom:
"with your feet in the air and your head on the ground
try this trick, and spin it, yeah
your head will collapse if there's nothing in it"
-pixies, "where is my mind?"
8.) What do you wish you were doing right now?:
"Up and down the coast
Checkin' out the spots that i love the most."
sublime, "paddle out"
9.) What do you think of drugs and alcohol?:
"Sniffing sulfate up my nose
Doing it for a joke
It makes the world spin so fast
Things go better with coke"
-subhumans, "drugs of youth"
10.) If you could say one thing to your enemy, what would it be?:
"nice to know you... goodbye!"
incubus, "nice to know you"
11.) What do you usually do on Friday nights?:
stuff.
12.) What do you think about world peace?:
"no fighting no war no trouble no more"
-lost cherrees, "no trouble" .... if only it were that simple
13.) What do you think about school?:
"The same people who control the school system control
The prison system, and the whole social system"
dead prez, "they schools"
"Won't you believe it
It's just my luck
No recess
You're in high school again"
-nirvana, "school"
14.) How do you feel right now?:
"i'm not happy and i'm not sad"
the smiths, "this night has opened my eyes"
15.) Any closing words?:
"it's not my fault that i'm fucked up"
-naked aggression, "plastic world
A colorful survey
RED
What is love? something i can't define.
Name 3 things you feel very passionate about: food, sleep, oxygen.
Does fire fascinate you? certainly.
Do you have a short temper? yes. yes. yes.
Are you a friend to dragons? yes?
Are you very warm hearted? not really.
Do you feel intense emotions? sometimes.
ORANGE
Are you bright? as in intelligent? yes.
What are the three most wholesome things you've done lately? made dinner for the family, had a decent conversation with my little sister, helped an old lady cross the road.
Is vibrance a good characteristic to have? it can be.
Are you rich in self confidence? no, i am devoid of it.
Are you rich in vitamin c? yes.
Is lala orange your favorite rainbow bright character? you can't choose favorites.
YELLOW
Are you a very happy person? occasionally
Do you like the sun? yes. and no.
Do you ever feel utter and complete joy? i have a few times.
Do you feel like the volume in your life is all the way up? no.
Do you feel warm inside when you hug people? if i love them, and the hug is completely voluntary.
If you were a care bear would you be cheer bear? i would be the blue one.
Are you lemon scented? after dusting furniture with lemon scented pledge and mopping the floor with lemon scented pine sol, yes.
GREEN
Are you incredibly lucky? no.
Are you easy going? i can be at times.
Are you very mischievious? yeah
Are you very lusty/sexy? of course...
Ever find a four leafed clover? yes.
Are you fresh like mint? no
Does nature speak to you? it tells me to burn things.
BLUE
Do you love to look at water? when i am not gazing at my lava lamp.
Are you calm/relaxed? no.
Is it very difficult to upset you? i am easily irritated, but not upset.
Are you at peace? i have yet to meet one person fully at peace.
Are you comforting? i am not sure.
Are you well balanced? you think dance classes would have helped me walk in a straight line, but they didn't.
Are you content? my friend christ calls me "unsatisfied"
PURPLE
Are you royalty? my name means faerie queen. yes.
Are you very free spirited? yes.
Are you conceited? no.
Do you have a passion for indulgence? yes.
Are you a grape? no no no.
Are you a purple horseshoe? of course not.
PINK
Are you less than intense? no.
Are you incredibly feminine? i can be at times...
BLACK
Do you absorb everything possible? yes.
Are you incredibly energetic? never.
GOLD
Are you expensive? not really.
Are you worth it? define "it" por favor.
RED
What is love? something i can't define.
Name 3 things you feel very passionate about: food, sleep, oxygen.
Does fire fascinate you? certainly.
Do you have a short temper? yes. yes. yes.
Are you a friend to dragons? yes?
Are you very warm hearted? not really.
Do you feel intense emotions? sometimes.
ORANGE
Are you bright? as in intelligent? yes.
What are the three most wholesome things you've done lately? made dinner for the family, had a decent conversation with my little sister, helped an old lady cross the road.
Is vibrance a good characteristic to have? it can be.
Are you rich in self confidence? no, i am devoid of it.
Are you rich in vitamin c? yes.
Is lala orange your favorite rainbow bright character? you can't choose favorites.
YELLOW
Are you a very happy person? occasionally
Do you like the sun? yes. and no.
Do you ever feel utter and complete joy? i have a few times.
Do you feel like the volume in your life is all the way up? no.
Do you feel warm inside when you hug people? if i love them, and the hug is completely voluntary.
If you were a care bear would you be cheer bear? i would be the blue one.
Are you lemon scented? after dusting furniture with lemon scented pledge and mopping the floor with lemon scented pine sol, yes.
GREEN
Are you incredibly lucky? no.
Are you easy going? i can be at times.
Are you very mischievious? yeah
Are you very lusty/sexy? of course...
Ever find a four leafed clover? yes.
Are you fresh like mint? no
Does nature speak to you? it tells me to burn things.
BLUE
Do you love to look at water? when i am not gazing at my lava lamp.
Are you calm/relaxed? no.
Is it very difficult to upset you? i am easily irritated, but not upset.
Are you at peace? i have yet to meet one person fully at peace.
Are you comforting? i am not sure.
Are you well balanced? you think dance classes would have helped me walk in a straight line, but they didn't.
Are you content? my friend christ calls me "unsatisfied"
PURPLE
Are you royalty? my name means faerie queen. yes.
Are you very free spirited? yes.
Are you conceited? no.
Do you have a passion for indulgence? yes.
Are you a grape? no no no.
Are you a purple horseshoe? of course not.
PINK
Are you less than intense? no.
Are you incredibly feminine? i can be at times...
BLACK
Do you absorb everything possible? yes.
Are you incredibly energetic? never.
GOLD
Are you expensive? not really.
Are you worth it? define "it" por favor.
i have nothing to do, lets fill out pointless surveys....
Drank an alcoholic beverage?: part of drinks, but never enough to feel a thing
Smoked?: no
Done any illegal recreational drug?: no?
Kissed somebody passionately?: no
Kissed somebody of the same sex passionately?: no
Had sex?: i am a "cynical virgin"
Had sex with a member of the same sex?: no
Been in a threesome/orgy/whatever?: no
Shoplifted?: yes.... "shoplifters of the world, unite and take over"
Cheated on a test?: yes.
Broken a bone?: no
Come extremely close to dying?: i had pnuemonia once, but i really wasn't that close to dying
Been inside a mosh pit?: yeah
Rode a skateboard down a really steep hill?: i wish
Skydived/bungee jumped/hang glided?: one day i will
Made an explosive device?: if i knew how, i would.
Made a work of art/music because you wanted to?: what to you think i do in my room all day?
Written a story/essay because you wanted to?: yes.
Read a book/seen a movie that changed your view of the world?: not significantly
Been in love?: nope
Disliked somebody so much you wished them dead?: many times.
Did you kill them?: unfortunately, no.
Physically pushed yourself to the point of puking?: yeah
Been so nervous you puked?: yes
Laughed so hard your entire body hurt and/or you almost passed out?: yes
Cried so hard you eventually fell asleep from exhastion?: yes
Been so happy you seriously wished the moment could last forever?: yes
Been so depressed you seriously considered suicide?: no
Attempted suicide?: no
Had somebody close to you die?: yes
Spoke/sang in public?: please don't remind me of singing in the church chior....
Been naked in public?: no
Acted in a play?: if those things we did in elementary school even count, yes
Won a sports trophy?: i have some dance trophies
Witnessed a murder/see somebody die?: hmmm
Been in a fist fight?: no
Picked up a book and read it all in one sitting?: all the time
Stayed awake the entire night up into the next day?: last night and so many nights before
Been so intoxicated you couldn't remember the night when you woke up?: nope
Read the Bible?: parts of it, in in church and sunday school
Read the satanic bible?: hm, where can i get a copy?
Learned to play an instrument?: flute, oboe, guitar
Ran a marathon?: tanya does not run unless her life is in serious danger.
Been stood up for a date?: nope
Stood somebody up for a date?: no
Met somebody famous?: yes.
Drank an alcoholic beverage?: part of drinks, but never enough to feel a thing
Smoked?: no
Done any illegal recreational drug?: no?
Kissed somebody passionately?: no
Kissed somebody of the same sex passionately?: no
Had sex?: i am a "cynical virgin"
Had sex with a member of the same sex?: no
Been in a threesome/orgy/whatever?: no
Shoplifted?: yes.... "shoplifters of the world, unite and take over"
Cheated on a test?: yes.
Broken a bone?: no
Come extremely close to dying?: i had pnuemonia once, but i really wasn't that close to dying
Been inside a mosh pit?: yeah
Rode a skateboard down a really steep hill?: i wish
Skydived/bungee jumped/hang glided?: one day i will
Made an explosive device?: if i knew how, i would.
Made a work of art/music because you wanted to?: what to you think i do in my room all day?
Written a story/essay because you wanted to?: yes.
Read a book/seen a movie that changed your view of the world?: not significantly
Been in love?: nope
Disliked somebody so much you wished them dead?: many times.
Did you kill them?: unfortunately, no.
Physically pushed yourself to the point of puking?: yeah
Been so nervous you puked?: yes
Laughed so hard your entire body hurt and/or you almost passed out?: yes
Cried so hard you eventually fell asleep from exhastion?: yes
Been so happy you seriously wished the moment could last forever?: yes
Been so depressed you seriously considered suicide?: no
Attempted suicide?: no
Had somebody close to you die?: yes
Spoke/sang in public?: please don't remind me of singing in the church chior....
Been naked in public?: no
Acted in a play?: if those things we did in elementary school even count, yes
Won a sports trophy?: i have some dance trophies
Witnessed a murder/see somebody die?: hmmm
Been in a fist fight?: no
Picked up a book and read it all in one sitting?: all the time
Stayed awake the entire night up into the next day?: last night and so many nights before
Been so intoxicated you couldn't remember the night when you woke up?: nope
Read the Bible?: parts of it, in in church and sunday school
Read the satanic bible?: hm, where can i get a copy?
Learned to play an instrument?: flute, oboe, guitar
Ran a marathon?: tanya does not run unless her life is in serious danger.
Been stood up for a date?: nope
Stood somebody up for a date?: no
Met somebody famous?: yes.
so i haven't written in a while.... i am in an awkward typing position. i am at cassie's house. now i am on the cushion. yes. so i am tired, yeah. palm springs is hell, don't go there unless you are OLD. we are going to watch abandon, its a movie, it has katie holmes, isn't that fascinating? cassie wishes she could play guitar, as do i. pretending is so fun. "don't take guitar lessons from someone you are in love with"- cassie. that is a typical emo kid mistake. anything to be by the one you love, regardless if they like you back. that's not important. the only important thing is that you are there, with them, alone.
ok so now it is a few hours since i've started this entry. yeah. marc is hot. attractive. gorgeous. me and cassie were in his room, and he fell asleep while we talked to him. wow. i hope he had nothing on under his blanket. marc, if you for some reason read this, i just want to let you know that i want to rape you.so now there is nothing to do really, i am horrible at occupying myself. "i am not alone in thinking that you make Ghandi look like a child pornographer"
ok so now it is a few hours since i've started this entry. yeah. marc is hot. attractive. gorgeous. me and cassie were in his room, and he fell asleep while we talked to him. wow. i hope he had nothing on under his blanket. marc, if you for some reason read this, i just want to let you know that i want to rape you.so now there is nothing to do really, i am horrible at occupying myself. "i am not alone in thinking that you make Ghandi look like a child pornographer"
Friday, July 11, 2003
oh my, now i take quizilla quizzes then post the results on my blog, i am so afraid for myself. i have nothing to do and i am waiting for a song to download... if you read this call me and entertain me. call me even if you don't like me or don't even know me, it doesn't matter. i will bake cookies for the first person to satisfactorily entertain me.
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
